Why does the feeling of missing out arise during the rehab process?

Even if we choose to stop smoking, at some point during withdrawal, we will experience a sense of missing out. We might be sitting in a cafe, notice someone lighting up a joint with their coffee, or encounter similar situations. In such moments, we may find ourselves thinking, ‘Wow, I wish I could do that too. It’s a shame he can and I can’t.’

It seems to us that the sense of missing out arises from the sacrifices we make to give up the perceived benefits of cannabis, but the truth is, we make a lot of concessions in life with almost every choice we make – the sacrifice itself is not the problem.

When we buy something for our house, we give up money to enhance our quality of life; when we sign up for courses or a training program, we sacrifice our free time to improve our skills and education.

It’s not that these sacrifices don’t cause us discomfort; obviously, we would prefer to keep our money or spend as little of it as possible. However, we aren’t consumed by a sense of missing out every time we remember these purchases because this feeling doesn’t come from sacrifice but from the sense that we aren’t getting something valuable in return. When we feel that we’ve merely given something up without gaining anything, that’s when the sense of missing out hits us.

We sit in a cafe, see someone smoking, and crave the calmness they seem to experience – unless we are well into our detox journey and already reaping its benefits. If we are more energetic and life is treating us better, we will probably feel pity for that person who’s smoking and think, ‘What a shame for him. He doesn’t realize there are fulfilling experiences in life that he can’t have while stoned.’

This implies that the feeling of missing out can sneak up on us when we feel that we aren’t sufficiently rewarded by the detoxification process. This is typical during the early stages of the process when everything seems difficult and pointless, but it can also occur in later stages if we’re grappling with unresolved problems and difficulties.

A rehab process doesn’t provide the instant gratification of buying a new couch for the living room, nor does it offer the sense of future security that enrolling in an educational course does. In both these instances, the exchange is clear – we lose something definite and gain something else that’s also definite.

During the rehab process, the exchange deal is less certain – we know what we’re giving up, but we’ll only find out exactly what we’ve gained further down the line.

Therefore, the next time the feeling of missing out arises, it’s important to treat it as a signal light that illuminates the fact that we’re not being sufficiently rewarded for the difficulty of quitting smoking. It’s an opportune time to consider what we’re lacking, where we need help, and what could make the process easier for us. Most importantly, we should remind ourselves that our perspective on this moment could drastically change in just a few weeks.

we need help, and what could make the process easier for us. Most importantly, we
should remind ourselves that our perspective on this moment could drastically change in
just a few weeks.