A common mistake that occurs during the initiation of a withdrawal process is the inclination to view our lives dichotomously as two separate states – with cannabis or without it.
After achieving a smoke-free month, we often begin comparing our experiences and may even draw up a list of pros and cons. We reflect on what life was like when we smoked, contrast it with our present experience, and try to assess if quitting was truly worth it.
However, life is not a static before-and-after situation; it’s an ongoing process of coping and growth.
Suppose we quit smoking and realize after a month that social gatherings no longer feel enjoyable without cannabis. If we were to merely compare the past and the present, we’d restrict ourselves to two options: either persist with abstinence and endure unexciting social gatherings or return to smoking and regain our prior enjoyment.
But consider this – what if all the cannabis in the world disappeared, and we could no longer smoke? Would we eternally dread social gatherings? Most likely not. We’d probably try to comprehend what’s amiss for us at these events and deal with it.
Perhaps we would find out that it’s challenging for us to be vulnerable, but we would gradually discover ways to open up. It might be uncomfortable initially, but we would adapt over time, and our social experience would start to improve.
Alternatively, we could realize that the conversation topics don’t intrigue us, leading us to either enrich the dialogue or change our social circle. It might seem difficult initially, but we would gradually develop an interest in these social engagements.
When cannabis is removed from the equation, we confront the deficiencies in our lives that were previously masked. It’s these deficiencies that we can then begin to address and find means to compensate for. This is the essence of the coping and growth process.
Social gatherings are merely one example among the many potential areas where we could face a deficiency. Other aspects could include worries about the future, job stability, interpersonal relationships, romance, sexuality, goal accomplishment, creativity, and so forth.
A successful withdrawal process doesn’t simply involve quitting smoking. It also requires identifying and addressing what we’re missing in our lives, so we can compensate for these gaps ourselves rather than letting cannabis obscure them.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with making a list of pros and cons. At times, this could provide the motivation we need to persist and prevent us from reverting to smoking. It’s vital, however, to remember that the list of cons can be minimized by adequately addressing them.
So the next time your mind starts compiling a list, seize the opportunity to contemplate how to improve the aspects of life that aren’t serving you well. After all, that’s why we quit smoking, isn’t it?
If you momentarily feel that your situation is worsening because life has become more difficult since you quit smoking, recognize that the opposite is true. Your situation is improving because you’re finally prepared to confront what you’re lacking in life. It may not be pleasant, but it’s an essential phase in the journey.
